So I’m at work cooking some Broccoli and Cauliflower in the microwave in a bag so it steams.  Nothing like some freshly steamed B&C for a mid morning healthy snack.

I’m in a room with 4 women, 2 of which have enough perfume on to burn my eyes…… no joke!  Actually watering eyes when I walk in the room.  It’s where the fridge and microwave is that is large enough to fit my lunch pale that my loving wife packs for me. 

I’m heating it up in the Mic and one of the ladies says “what stinks?” as I stand near by watching my digital timer count down to the moment of deliciousness.  A simple reply of “It’s my food” from myself is enough (so I thought) to suggest the fact that I wasn’t exactly pleased with her response.  No Harm No Foul. 


Snack is done.  I take the bag of Green and White tastiness that resembles a scared blowfish out of the microwave and begin to leave that area when the other lady in the room (the other one with perfume that seems to be applied with a water cannon from the Bellagio Fountains) chimes up with a loud “ewww, what’s that stink?!?!?”

Now, I’m irritated as I put the bag up to my nose to inspect….. Just smells like yummy cooked veggies to me?  I almost retaliate with a comment about air quality in the room being dangerously close to the combustion sweet spot, but I bit my tongue and hit the road. 

I get back to my desk to continue working while my snack cools a smidge (that microwave puts out almost 700watts in a full sprint effort).  In walks someone with the comment of “Who cooked THAT?  IT STINKS!”

REALLY folks?  It’s f’ing vegetables!  Go eat a donut and sit on your butt some more. 


I swear the next person that says something about my food is going to get a half empty tuna container put in their trash can under their desk after I warm it up in the microwave!

I will have no reason to contain my crop dusting that is scheduled for a few hours from now to just my own cubicle.  You wanna make my eyes water with your perfume?  I’m going to make your’s water with mine!