Today was the last day at NYSEG. At 11:00am this morning I’m officially ‘unemployed’ and living on dreams.
Soon the reality of taking on a new profession and helping it grow will hit. For now, I’m smiling. Right now I am nervous but at the same time the most excited I think I have been in the longest time. Following my heart and being brave is more rewarding all ready than wondering “what if”.
I wish I had something truly deep and philisophical to say about this move, but I don’t. For the past 6 years most everyone that has known me has known my life revolves around sport. It seems to be pretty narrowed down to Triathlon, but the three sports that make it up have been my “go to” for a while.
Leaving that steady work that I have grown to resent for it’s ‘steadiness’ is something that frightens me. This same fear is exhilarating perhaps the same as the first Triathlon that I ever did. It’s been a while since I have felt that rush of adrenaline. That excitment of the unknown. It showed in everything I’ve done lately. Being secure isn’t in my human nature. Being scared reminds me I’m alive.
For this reason I signed up for a 50mile running race in June that I haven’t even begun to train for! It scares the shit out of me. Moving to someplace I can’t afford to be, scares the shit out of me. I know that running 50 miles and changing my life as drastically as I am are not the same, but I know I have the mental strength to make it through 50miles of running and no matter what I will succeed. I feel the same about my decision to move our family from the steady and known into that great big abyss of unknown.
Kelly and I are up for a challenge. The kids are excited to get a chance to join in.
(not sure if that made any sense, i just started typing and that’s what came out. feels great.)